i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Randomize
