If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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