she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
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