I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
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