How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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