I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I am one with the molecules
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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