Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
should my penis look like a turkey
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Randomize
