Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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