clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Randomize