"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Randomize