The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
