Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
