I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
