11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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