Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
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