Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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