Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
