marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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