How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
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