it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
