Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
