she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
