i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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