I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
