Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Randomize
