Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
