so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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