Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
