i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
