It's Friday. Sex?
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize
