I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
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