The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I should be sponsored by Trojan
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
You had me at "let me see your balls"
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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