I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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