Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
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