i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
