When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
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