She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
