Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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