you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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