All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
