is your mom at the bar?
I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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