OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
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