i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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