It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
