some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
