put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize