Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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