we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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