Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
