How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Someone signed my nipple.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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