there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
